3 Things You Should Do When Writing Your Own Vows

This is it. This is the crowing glory of your custom wedding. What you say to your future spouse will be a lasting memory. Here are three tips that will help you make the most of this moment and make sure it means the most to you. For our first anniversary, Tim framed our vows. They now hang on our bedroom wall and are one of my favorite pieces to reflect on in the house.

1. Talk with your partner about the mood of your vows

We’re assuming you’ve already made the decision to write your own vows, but have you talked about the “mood.” When you have a partner that’s lighthearted, this is something you’ll want to cover before reflecting on what you’ll be saying. By communicating about the feelings you’ll be expressing, you’ll be on the same page about what to write. This relieves some anxiety of either trying to be overly sentimental or force humor when you really want to be romantic.

2. Determine a goal length

Communicating how long you hope your vows will be gives a little bit of relief if you’re worried about how long you’ll have to speak. It’ll also be sure to put an expectation on a partner if they tend to be long winded.

3. Don’t force it

I’ll admit that I didn’t write my vows until the night before my wedding. I actually even shared that in my vows. With all of the stress that came with wedding planning, I was just having a difficult time getting out of the current moment and thinking about the future and history of our relationship. It was in the clarity of the night before that I was able to finally find the words that I wanted to say. Tim took it a different way and researched to include the many different subtle inclusions of traditions and nerdisms. Whatever your situation and preference, try not to make this one other thing that’s going to stress you out. Take your time. Let the words flow from love.

As part of our services, we are happy to help brainstorm and provide vow examples for you.